Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
My life has turned into sitting in the driveway listening to Total Eclipse of the Heart while staring at the Blue Moon. Hey, August. Let's be nice. I need help.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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