im so drunk with asians
where?
always
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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