I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
It's a hurricane, not a zombie apocalypse. WHY DID YOU BUY SHOTGUNS?!?!
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Randomize
