I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
