hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
