Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
