I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
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