If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
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