Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
Randomize
