He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
YOU GOT ME SO DRUNKK
i got me so drunk!
Randomize
