I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Randomize
