I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
why the fuck is there hamburger meat in the toaster. i repeat: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE HAMBURGER MEAT IN MY NEW TOASTER
I don't think it's ever a good night if I'm this hung over and I didn't even get an orgasm out of the deal...
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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