the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
Randomize
