I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
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