Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
I have two black x marks on my hands.
Yep you got cut off last night after a stripper bent over in front of you and you screamed very loudly 'I can see your soul from here'
damnit I wish I could remember that.
I think my vagina is haunted
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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