tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
it glows. i had to have it.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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