I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Enjoy the penises
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
Randomize
