you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
Never go with a hippy to a second location. I fucking hate Xanax.
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Randomize
