But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
Randomize
