Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Randomize
