Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
Randomize
