I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
Tip for today: never try to fart and swallow at the same time. You'll end up choking on whatever you are currently swallowing and shit yourself from the freakout of choking.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
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