I'm pants shitting drunk right now
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
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