mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
if you go to jail tonight, call call me. i wanna get out of work
Randomize
