I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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