HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
She announced her abortion via fbk
home. puking in laundry basket.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
Randomize
