@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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