wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Walked off the dance floor to find Gabe hitting on a dad bod at the bar. It was my Dad. Awkward is an understatement.
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