cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Randomize
