everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
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