If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
How the hell do you leave a party with a kitten? It's missing and everyone knows it was you.
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I was wondering how I got the burn marks on my boobs and then I remembered....
The baked potato bra?
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Randomize
