If i could tip my vagina, i would.
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
