the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Running into your random closeted hookup from last night is really awkward when you have to sit next to him and his girlfriend in a 200 person class.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
Randomize
