I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
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