I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
Houston, we have a squirter
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
I spent ten minutes questioning her on what kind of cup she wanted... Then I asked what kind of water she wanted..
WOAH TOO HIGH
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize