Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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