He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
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