I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
she looked like the before picture.
a search helicopter?!
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Randomize
