From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
On a scale from 1-10 how wrong is it to request "I Hit It First" at my ex's wedding reception?
Definite 12.2 but worth it.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
So now your dad has seen my tits. You could have told me he was coming by to help paint.
I didn't think you'd be painting the kitchen topless.
I couldn't find a shirt I was willing to ruin.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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