I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
I literally have anal toys soaking in the bathroom sink and dinner on the stove. If that doesn't scream "domestic goddess", I don't know what the fuck does.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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