And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
If you think eating a bowl of leftover stuffing and drinking champagne from the bottle in dirty sweats at 9am is sexy... Then yeah, I'm your girl.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
