she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
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