Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
