dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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