Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
He called himself Jesus all night but I'm not sure if that's his real name or not
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
This is an alert from the drunk police: you have reached the point of no return. Text messages past this point are illegible.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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