i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
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