I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So after THIS dui, I've decided to stop driving. Not drinking, just quit driving.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Randomize
