If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Whelp, I woke up on the front lawn this morning. I have got to stop wearing these underwear. Every time I do, I end up puking in someone's greenery.
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
