Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
She's trying to change her flight... IM BEING COCKBLOCKED BY DELTA CUSTOMER SERVICE
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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