I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
